17wks (1d)

I can't believe I am less than a month away from being halfway through this pregnancy. It boggles my mind! I've also known about her existence for three months (and 1 day) now and that is also mind blowing. Especially considering how dramatic the first couple weeks of that knowledge was. I remember when I thought I wouldn't be able to write a weekly entry, and here I am! Three months, later, writing one for seventeen weeks and knowing that she is a SHE. And she has been doing well, I think! I still can't feel her, even though Jason is convinced he can. It's cute. This morning he put his hand on my stomach to say goodbye to her before going to work and was like "Katie, I swear, she's moving!" I tried to convince him that if I can't feel her then he definitely can't, but his excuse was "you're sleeping, you don't know!" Soon enough though! I should be able to feel her in the next coming weeks. And with the way she was kicking in that ultrasound I have no doubt she will make her presence known soon and often. I've also had a kickstart in my need to pee. It's all the time! I feel like every hour I have another full bladder. This is boggling to me since before I got pregnant I hardly ever had to use the bathroom. To the point where Jason was convinced there was something wrong with me! And now? Those days are long gone!! Also my appetite is definitely picking up. Last night I called Jason demanding Philly Cheesesteaks for dinner and a couple nights before then I had the biggest craving for Chinese takeout. I also got myself Ensure Protein drinks, since I'm having a hard time with getting enough protein and I wanted to get something to help. Even if it tastes like chalk.

I'm also finding it super hard to resist shopping for her. I just want to go out and get everything she needs and set up that nursery and buy everything at Janie and Jack even though it is the most absurdly over priced store in existence (though it should be noted that I managed to resist buy the CUTEST swimsuit that was on sale for $12 - self restraint thy name is Katie). I DID, however, buy all my bedding and some room decor since it was on clearance at Babies-R-Us. It's so cute and I'm SO happy with it. Greens and browns and whites and BUNNIES (though, Bunny, if you're reading this post, I have to say that as soon as I realized they're GREEN bunnies the only thing I can think of is you, lol). I have the 6 piece bedding set (fitted sheet, duvet and duvet cover, bumpers, dust ruffle, window valance, and diaper stacker), a lamp, a mobile, a 2 piece wall art, and an extra fitted sheet! I can't tell you how relieved I was when I finally purchase that and brought it home. It's like I've finally started putting things together for her. Like I have something she needs. Am I still panicky about the fact that her nursery is still a storage room? Why yes. Yes I am. Jason and I seem to have very different worries however. The other day we had a conversation that went so:
Jason: "We're having a girl. We have to worry about boys. And she's going to want to get married."
Me: "Honey. She's not even fully formed yet. Marriage is a long way away, we don't have to worry about that. What we should worry about? Her room is filled with stuff."
Jason: "We have plenty of time to clean out the nursery, Katie."
Me: "Oh. So her nursery can wait, but she's getting married soon?"
Jason: "... Yes! She's getting married really soon!"

Speaking of Bebe being not fully formed yet! She (I can say she :D) is now the size of a large onion, being 5" long and about 5 ounces! Her skeleton is hardening from soft cartilage to bone and her umbilical cord is growing stronger and thicker. She now has sweat glands (important, but it seems so random while she's cooped up in there) and MOST interestingly - Bebe can now sleep in REM cycles and dream. I have no idea what she can possibly be dreaming about though. Perhaps she is dreaming of doing more backflips, or dreaming of sucking her thumb again. I'm not sure. But it's fascinating that she is capable of it and does it. I wish I knew what was going on in her little head. It's so bizarre that she is growing inside of me and I have no idea what she is thinking or feeling or experiencing. I suppose this is just preparing me for having her outside the womb where I'd beg, borrow, steal or kill to be able to have an inkling of what she's thinking.

I am going to leave this post today with what the AMAZING Lindsay @ You Are The Roots (henceforth to be known as my Pregnancy Fairy Godmother) sent Bebe!! She even addressed it to her! Jason came in with it like "What did you buy for the baby? I told you not to buy anything." But ha! It was not me! THANK YOU SO MUCH LINDSAY!!!

"HI LITTLE GIRL!! Bebe I can't wait to meet you. Love, Ethan" (Lindsay's beautiful new baby boy)