11 wks (3ds)

Ding dong the clot is GONE! That's right people. No more subchorionic hematoma for me or Bebe! Guys I am so over the moon happy that I'm still on a high from it. I had my doctor's appt at 8:45am on Friday and I was so nervous. I had visions of going in there and being told that my clot wasn't gone and it was in fact bigger. Of being told that I couldn't go to Wisconsin. But I held it together (okay, that's a lie, I got into an argument with Jason on the way there over something stupid and cried hysterically for about 15 min. It's a miracle I didn't walk into my appointment looking like Lady Gaga) and went through the motions! My doctor was stuck in a meeting so I got to meet another doctor at the practice and she was fantastic! She tried the doppler on me even though I was only 11wks and we got a nice strong heartbeat after a little searching which made me breathe a bit easier as we went into the ultrasound. The u/s tech was an absolute doll and she did the first u/s abdominally where I got to see Bebe wiggling and squirming like crazy! Just as restless as his/her mama. She happily explained that there was no sign of a clot whatsoever and the heartbeat was a very healthy 166bpm. That was just the most beautiful words ever. And watching Jason point at the u/s screen exclaiming over Bebe moving around and different features was just as beautiful.

The u/s tech took us back to the nurses who put us in an exam room to wait for the doctor, but before the doctor came back she went and got us again. Because I'd had bleeding previously in my pregnancy she wanted to check my cervix just to make sure it was alright and there wasn't any signs of anything. So I went back with her and changed for the internal u/s. I know they're more invasive and uncomfortable, but I would not mind doing them every time if it means I can see my baby that clearly and beautifully each time. Bebe was SO CLEAR! We even got this amazing view of his/her brain! There's two hemispheres

and it looked like a perfect black and white miniature model of a human brain. Jason was ecstatic over that and requested a picture of that. Leave it to my husband to be obsessed with his baby's brain (I love you honey!). Then the u/s printed us out another set of photos and we got the absolutely phenomenal one you see here to the right. A perfectly clear and detailed picture of Bebe sucking on his/her thumb! There's toes and fingers and a nose and a mouth and a tiny eye fused shut and just these tiny limbs! I have been starring at this picture for the past two days obsessively, you have no idea. I'm half convinced it's the greatest ultrasound picture to ever be taken ever - especially at this early stage. Anyways, after that u/s - where we were assured my cervix was just fine - we went back to see the doctor who answered all of our questions. Seriously, Jason pulled out his phone where we'd written all the things we wanted to ask but were worried we'd forget after seeing Bebe. The doctor told us we were the cutest couple she'd ever seen as we did this. After the doctor's appointment we ran errands until almost 5pm and then came home and did a ton of cleaning and stuff so I was so exhausted that I passed out without writing this entry on Friday. Then Saturday I went to my husband's cousin's daughter's first birthday - which was a Tinkerbell theme, so you know I was thrilled with it - and we didn't get back till late and I passed out again.

But today! I was determined to write this today! My due date was moved up one day to January 12, which makes Bebe 11 weeks 3 days and 1.6" - about the size of a small lime (if you measure it horizontal, not vertically). Bebe has been growing hair follicles and tooth buds and nail beds. Ears are almost in their normal shape and the tiny nose has even teenier nasal passages. Bones are beginning to harden too! As we saw in our ultrasound, Bebe is busy moving and kicking and stretching, even if I can't feel them. Bebe's even hiccoughing now as the little diaphragm forms, but I can't feel that either. As for me, I have

been nauseous all week and I threw up for the first time on Friday!! Shush, I'm excited. It was barely anything and only because I was chewing up my prenatals and all of a sudden the texture had me gagging so bad the prenatals came back up. But it made me smile for a little because I felt pregnant! Also, apparently I do have a bump as my friend Lucy put this photomanip together to convince me of my 4wk and 10wk photos. Thanks Lucy. My dreams have also been insane. The other night I had a dream that I had the baby at 20wks but she (in my dream I had a girl) was the size of a full term baby and all she wanted to do was sleep. And I kept waking her up to feed and I put her back in her crib and said to Jason "I'm going to be really sad when I wake up and this is a dream." Which of course in dream world is cue for the dream to just deteriorate into the absurd and the baby started talking, walking and going to History classes with me. So, definitely a dream. Additionally: My face is absurdly broken out and the idea of meat products are completely unappetizing.

On July 7 I will be in my 2nd trimester!! This excites me so much. I want to be able to breathe. And I'm still on light activity until then so I'm excited to be able to be more active. And I'm excited to have an appetite again! Also, my next ultrasound isn't until 20wks so I've talked Jason into doing the Gender Reveal at a 3D ultrasound studio at 16 weeks because I cannot wait 9 weeks to find out if I'm having a boy or girl. Right now Jason is thinking boy, but I've been pretty convinced from the moment I found out I was pregnant that it's a girl. I don't know why. But I'd love a boy, so either way I'd be insanely excited. Speaking of ultrasounds, I'm going to leave you with some images from this weeks! Until later ♥

Top of Bebe's head and both arms

View from the back, laying on side

No more pictures, Bebe wants to go back to sleep

Big brained baby

And one more of my favorite picture! Bebe and the beloved thumb.

10 wks (1d)

It's ten weeks!! I'm a little late (again) but my company excuse still stands. I've had a fabulously full week. Last week I talked about how my cousin and her husband were in town for the weekend, but right after they left my sister, K, came up to spend a few days with me. We mostly hung out at my house since I was (still) getting over my cold but on Tuesday we went to Downtown Disney to meet up with my cousin for dinner and drinks (for everyone but me) , but then she left Wednesday. Which was perfect timing because Wednesday was my first class!! Our doctor's office offers an Early Pregnancy class and signed us up for it and it was really interesting. The Doctor and Nurse who put it on were very informative as well as entertaining. Best of all it served the purpose of (once again) reminding me that I'm pregnant and my jeans aren't fitting for a reason. Since in these days I'm so rarely nauseous that any reminders of all that make me feel pregnant are so welcome. Thursday was also super exciting because I got to meet up with a good friend and former coworker of mine who is in her second trimester and tell her I was pregnant too!! It's really exciting to be pregnant with someone I know and feel comfortable with who lives in the same city as me. She's only about a month and a half ahead of me so it's still close enough that I feel like I have a partner in crime with this all and it was so refreshing to be able to walk around the mall with our caffeine free fraps and compare symptoms and discuss nursery designs and clothes and our inability to get comfortable. I came home feeling really happy - and really pregnant. Then Friday I had my cousin back! We made pizza and played Apples 2 Apples and I had the worst night's sleep of my life.

But I'll get into that later! The important thing is that Bebe is now 1¼", and roughly the size of a kumquat (see side image). A lot of sites say "prune" but I don't want to compare my baby to a prune. Eww. Other people were saying "walnut" but I'm not quite sold on that. You can use walnut if you, like K, have visceral shudders at the name "kumquat" but seeing as I have actually eaten this fruit before (the skin tastes sweet, like inside an orange, and the inside is sour, like a lemon, so it's a neat contrast) I have no qualms with it and will continue to refer to it this week as Kumquat. Moving on! The most exciting thing is Bebe is no longer an embryo!! We are now officially a Fetus. This feels like a big deal to me and I am excited about it since, apparently according to the internet, the most critical period of development has passed. It's also been three weeks since my 7 weeks appointment where I

was diagnosed with the subchorionic hematoma and told it would dissipate in 3-4 weeks! Friday (4 weeks since) I will have my next ultrasound and be able to see for sure if I can breathe again but since these last 3 weeks were so critical for me and I'm feeling fine and have had no sign of bleeding, my hopes are high. Bebe is also a busy little fetus right now! Swallowing is possible, even though it's just fluid, and kicking is the name of the game as it paddles around inside my uterus (which has gone from the size of a small pear to the size of a grapefruit). All of the vital organs (including the kidneys, intestines, brain, and liver [which is now making red blood cells in place of the yolk sack which is slowly but surely disappearing]) are in place and beginning to function, though they still have a long way to go to getting to their full potential. The growing brain is causing Bebe's forehead to bulge for the moment and the head makes up half of the body length! In other physicalities, it's all about the little details that are making up Bebe this week. Peach fuzz is starting to sprout over the skin and teeny tiny fingernails are beginning to form on fingers and toes that aren't webbed anymore! Speaking of unwebbed limbs, they can now bend at the little indents which will turn into knees and elbows!

As for me, symptoms haven't changed much. The smell of fish and smoked meats make me shudder and all I want to eat are yogurt and clementines and the occasional toasted bread with something. I feel exhausted all the time, but naps are apparently the bane of my existence. Whenever I take them I am completely unable to sleep at night. Last night was a fantastic example, for instance. I went to bed around 10:30 and ended up tossing and turning until midnight and then waking up to pee around 2 and finding sleep to be out of the question. So I read a book, ate some yogurt, and finished the book. By the time my cousin and her husband left for the airport and my husband left for work I was finally tired again and fell asleep around 9 but woke up around 1pm and was fully awake. With any luck I'll sleep tonight because I have a pool party to go to at my step-sister's! I got some nausea last night that helped with the not sleeping, but after I ate some yogurt my stomach calmed down. Buttoning my jeans is a far distant memory that I will fondly miss and my waist is quickly losing shape. My boobs? They're bigger. And I finally feel like I'm related to the rest of the girls in my family. Yesterday I was just this pile of bloat and was having the worst gas bubble pains that finally dissipated after drinking three straight glasses of water. Today - aside from being exhausted - I am doing all right. Famished, but that's par for the course these days since I can rarely find foods that are filling and substantial that seem appetizing to me. I'm really crossing my fingers that in 3 weeks when I leave this trimester food will return to being enjoyable to me! But the real thing I'm excited about? Seeing Bebe on Friday.

A dream is a wish your heart makes...

Last night I had a dream that I woke up and had a small baby bump. It was barely there, but I could feel it and I walked around the house with my hand on it just enjoying it.

Then I woke up and there was no bump. It was just bloat. And I was really sad and I wanted to go back to sleep so I could feel it again.

9wks (2ds)

Hi! Sorry I'm late. I have a good excuse this time, I swear! So Friday - when I became 9 weeks - I woke up around 6am so that my husband and I could leave our parents' to make the three and a half hour drive back to our house. But not JUST to go back home. We left so early so that we could pick up my amazing cousin and her husband from the airport! They stayed with us this weekend too, so rather than being completely antisocial, I resisted the urge to start the process of blogging while we were having fun. This was complicated by my other good excuse: I'm sick. Yet again. I've heard pregnant women are more susceptible to colds but I have now had TWO since finding out I was pregnant. That's two colds in five weeks! It hit me Friday afternoon after taking a nap. I woke up with my whole throat raw and my head absurdly congested. Saturday was even worse and today I feel like death warmed over. Pregnancy already zaps all of my energy so being sick on top of that just makes me feel as if I deserve a starring role in Dawn of the Dead. But I've been taking it super easy today and trying to will myself better since (one of) my sister(s), K, is coming up to visit tomorrow until Wednesday! Even sick, I love having my sisters visit so I'm really looking forward to having her around. Then Thursday I have one more day to take a breather and will myself healthy and my cousin stays with me for another night before she and her husband fly home on Saturday! It's a whirlwind but I'm so so happy I got the opportunity to see them and enjoy their company. It's been very enjoyable - even with the cold!

Last week was also a whirlwind of a week! While my husband was on a work trip, I got to stay at my Mom's house for the week! I love being able to visit with my family since we're hours away from them usually and I miss them so much. Saturday I went to a housewarming party at K's new place, which is gorgeous, and got to tell a couple more of my cousin's about Bebe! Then Sunday I went to Lindsay's absolutely adorable Baby Shower! It was so cute and I had such a good time and then I had the worst bought of nausea yet in this pregnancy. I tried to ignore it for a bit then my mom (who was also invited) took one look at me and went "You look awful. I'm taking you home." It sucks having the nausea but it happens so rarely these days that every time there is just this breath of

relief. Like "good, my hormones are working, this is a good thing." And, considering how relieved my Doctor was to hear that I had a little bit of nausea last week (taking any as a positive sign), I have been grateful each and every time the bouts have come - even if I don't feel like being grateful! Monday was a day to relax, and then Tuesday my youngest sister, M, and I went to K's classroom to help her organize. Her students - first graders - were adorable and one of the little boys asked me if I was really pregnant and when I said yes inquired to where the baby was. Then later that night we got to see a movie with my dad! Wednesday was the most exciting day, as M and I went shopping and were joined by my Mom who helped me find a ton of Maternity clothes. Yes, I know I'm only 9 weeks, but it is IMPOSSIBLE to button or zip my jeans - I swear. So I got a belly band so I could at least USE my jeans as well as some new bras (because I'm falling out of mine), a pair of capris and a pair of shorts, some tank tops, a t-shirt, a nice shirt, a dress, and a bathing suit! It's probably one of the few times that I've truly felt pregnant. Sometimes it just doesn't seem real yet. I was also surprised by Mom buying me this ADORABLE baby outfit with little sheep all over it - since I have been obsessed with lamb themes since early in my pregnancy. K also got me a cute little blanket as well. Bebe's first gifts!! Then Thursday I got to tell another of my friends about Bebe when we met up for cheesecake and then Friday I left! It was busy but that's what was so much fun!

However, now I'm home, and sick, and most important thing of all: Bebe is 9 weeks! This makes Bebe the size of a green olive, or, if you really want a fruit, a large grape. That's an inch long which means Bebe has doubled in size from last week and will continue on in this rapid growth. Baby has been busy this week! All the important body parts are there, but they'll be molded out to look a bit more polished in the next few months. That rapidly beating heart has divided into four chambers and the valves have started to form. Teeth that will be keeping both Bebe and I awake at night are forming beneath those tiny gums they will push through. Boy or girl? It's not distinguishable yet, but the tell tale organs are already there! The eyes are also fully formed, but eyelids are fused shut over them and they won't open for another 18 weeks. Organs, muscles and nerves are all starting to kick into

gear - and the mouth, nose, nostrils and earlobes are becoming more distinct. Finally the placenta is becoming more formed and should begin taking over essential hormone production. This is the most exciting to me! Why? Because in another 3 weeks I can stop taking that progesterone 3 times a day!! But at least I don't have to swallow those pills. Before pregnancy I was a champion at taking pills. I could swallow three advil without a problem. Now it's all I can do to swallow one tiny tylenol. And my giant horsepill known as prenatal? Oh forget it. Just looking at it makes me gag. I was suffering through it until I discovered my new best friend in the WORLD: Prenatal GUMMIES. YES GUMMIES. They smell horrendous, but they taste like candy and it makes me happy. I take two for my daily dose and chew them right up and it's goodbye pills and hello easy street. I don't know how I lived without them. Aside from not being able to swallow pills, I'm finding my list of food aversions to be far vaster than my cravings. If I could live on yogurt, clementines, ice cream and toast? I would be thrilled. Alas, I cannot, and I frequently am making myself eat nutritious things that make me want to gag. All for you Bebe. All. For. You. I'm also bloating like crazy! My mom called it a baby bump and I wanted to cry because it's not. It's just my tedious digestive system making me look fat. My boobs are absurd and hurt all the time. My face - which was clearing up - has now gotten worse and I feel like a middle schooler. Oh the joys! But as frustrating as it can be, I've never been happier. You know. Aside from the fear and paranoia bit that's keeping me on modified rest. But besides that? Totally cloud 9.

8 wks

If I finish this entry in the next 45 minutes I will be exactly 8 weeks pregnant today which makes this my first post that is exactly on time and I deserve a damn cookie for that. No, seriously, cookies sound fantastic right now. As I said in my last entry, this week has been an introduction to (lol) morning sickness which is more like night sickness since I'm just peachy when the sun is out. I can deal with the nausea and today at my Dr's appt he said that he was GLAD to hear I was nauseous because it was a really good sign. So now I feel vindicated. And tonight when I was feeling queasy I was happy about it. Will I be happy if I start tossing those cookies I just said I wanted? Well, happy will be a vast overstatement but I will take it because it means Bebe is doing fabulous things. My boobs feel huge, and fitting into my normal bras is getting uncomfortable. I've also started unbuttoning my jeans when I sit down because of some less than ideally placed bloating. A few weeks ago my face looked like a Proactive add, but it's clearing up a bit now (thank God). I'm also still having absurd dreams and I'm told I will have them for the remainder of the pregnancy. Lovely.

As for Bebe, it is currently the size of a raspberry! Which is much better than a kidney bean as was suggested on another site. I much prefer fruit. Anyways, Bebe has webbed fingers and toes right now! That's super exciting because before they were just arm buds. The tail is almost completely gone, and there are breathing tubes extending from the throat to the branches of the lungs. The little brain now has nerve cells that are branching out to connect to other nerve cells. Bebe is moving and bouncing around but I can't feel a thing. I really can't wait until I can.

Today I also got to go to my new OB for the first time and he was amazing! It took forever filling out paperwork, but the Dr was really nice and we talked a bit about different options and things. It was pretty easy going. He tried to hear the heartbeat with the doppler but it was too little so he requisitioned an ultra sound machine for me even though I wasn't really scheduled for one. It was amazing! It was an external one so we didn't get the best view, but once it popped onto the screen I was just entranced. It was seriously amazing and I could just sit and stare at that little screen with that little form of my baby all day. It's a good thing those things are so expensive otherwise I'd just find a way to get one and sit and stare at it ll day and nothing would ever get done. Anyways, Bebe's heart was beating at 174bpm which is a big jump from last week! And has convinced almost everyone that Bebe is a girl.

Anyways tomorrow I am going down to visit the parentals for a whole week while Jason's on a work trip! We have a baby shower for the amazing Lindsay (You Are The Roots) on Sunday too which is even more reason to be excited! And my mom has promised me shopping so hopefully I have an entry and some pics later in the week :D

Hello nausea, my new friend

It's here! Finally. Monday night around 7:30pm I got the worst wave of nausea and I was convinced I was going to be sick. I went to bed around 8:30 with a bowl just in case. I wasn't completely sure if this nausea was due to Morning Sickness or due to the fruit smoothie Jason made me an hour earlier since, haha, milk and I are not the best of friends. But last night, around 7:30, I get nauseous again. Not nearly as bad as Monday but I was getting several waves of it with an underlying queasy feeling. Jason also made me leftover smoked chicken and the smell of it made me want to be sick. The same chicken I ate just fine three days ago. But oh my goodness, the smokey smell on it and that smokey taste to it was just - I feel nauseous thinking about it even now. So we'll see how I fare tonight. Leave it to me to have completely nocturnal morning sickness.

Friday I will be 8 weeks! Friday will also be my first Doctor's appt with my OB instead of the Fertility Clinic. I decided not to go back to my usual OB/GYN due to a few issues I have had with the office staff (they've failed to return phone calls, lost my test results, and brushed off concerns of mine) so my mom asked around and found me an OB who came highly recommended and is associated with Winnie Palmer (where I'm going to deliver). His office called me yesterday and were going to see me today, but Jason had something going on at work he couldn't miss so the amazing assistant I talked to managed to get me in on Friday. I'm really excited to meet my new OB and (hopefully!) see Bebe again (and, inevitably, get a new due date).

Today we had new bedroom furniture delivered! Jason took me to pick some out this weekend because 1) I wasn't allowed to go to SeaWorld and 2) Ashley's Furniture was having a major sale. We found a GORGEOUS dark cherry wood bedroom set with a platform style sleigh bed and I'm in love. The delivery guys were EARLY (coming at 9:11 when the estimated time was between 9:45-1:45) and very quick and set the furniture up beautifully. I'll take pictures once Jason moves our old dressers out since right now everything looks crowded and mismatched. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to get both cats in the laundry room before the guys came and Daisy made me chase her all over the house until I could finally lock her up to keep her from getting outside or underfoot. So right now I'm having a bit of cramping from overexerting myself. No spotting or bleeding so I'm not worried, but I'm down for the count for the rest of today. Sad because I was really wanting to start putting clothes in my new dresser. But no playing Russian Roulette with Bebe! Clothes can WAIT.